27 February 2009

Contact, part two

I feel it necessary to say that I haven't stopped calling people in order to test anyone. And I didn't write the last post to make anyone feel bad. I was just feeling too connected. Like I was pouring too much of myself out. So I drew back. I think people get used to the roles they have in relationships. I was the Contacter. So I knew if I drew back, I'd have a few days of introspection to myself. I don't like being in that role all the time. I mean, everyone likes to feel invited along every now and then. Actually, it's worked out really well, the not calling. Sometimes I think I really enjoy being social and with others so I don't have to be introspective. It's been time well spent. The time "away."

I need to find the happy medium. I need to find it in time spent with others, time spent thinking and over thinking, how much I call people... All that and stuff. This isn't coming out eloquently. I guess I just wanted to say that I wasn't doing this as a reaction to anyone but myself. This is all in the hopes that I continue to grow. And I think I am.

In other news, asparagus really does make your pee smell funny. Huh.

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