29 June 2010

Only Babies Cry

I keep this in mind as I progress through the proverbial hell that is Institute. It gets harder with each passing day but in other ways it gets easier. I've built a rapport with my CMA (corps member advisor), I have a few friends and I still feel a little directionless. And I think that's okay.

Yesterday, in addition to working on lesson plans, I also made a mix CD for the members of the CMA group I'm in. It was so very therapeutic. Of course, none of these people know how to interpret my CDs and most of them probably won't figure it out but I'm okay with it. It was enough to make the CD.

I'm really enjoying my time teaching. There are the two girls I relate with because they both really enjoy reading. I spend a lot of time talking to them about life and such as well but they're great. And there's the one boy who I keep trying to reach out to but it's difficult when he's sleeping through half the class. It's a challenge and I love it.

The teaching part isn't hard. That's easy. The only thing easier for me is connecting with my students. It's breaking everything down in a manner that is TFA appropriate. That's the problem. I know that I break everything down and I analyze until you all want to punch me in the face as much as I want to punch myself in the face but oh, my goodness, I never knew there would be so many steps to plan a lesson. Gah.

But I do love it. And I definitely see teaching as something I can do forever. I just need a job.

Will everything else just fall into place?

-Theresa

20 June 2010

Week One, Down.

I'll be starting week two of institute tomorrow. I still don't have a real job yet but for summer school, I'm teaching 9th grade English. Pretty excited about that. I don't really have anything to say at the moment other than that I should be keeping better track of what's going on right now and I'm not. I did, however, come up with a classroom theme: Compose Your Future.

We keep track of class progress with a volume dial. Tickets that go out to students for acting properly throughout the day are concert ticket. The bathroom pass is the backstage pass. We keep track of consequences on the score. Raffle tickets students earn are turned in at the box office. If they win the raffle, they get the chance to choose what music we listen to in the morning. I'm pretty excited about it.

I have to finish doing some work now. Which is all I ever say anymore. But I also have to be awake at 4:50 tomorrow. In the morning. That's not a real time, I don't think.

-Theresa

10 June 2010

Maybe not.

Remember how I got sent away from that interview because already hired by a district? Yeah, me too. The schools for that district did their hiring today. I was not even interviewed. So I'm being thrown back into the hiring pool and could end up anywhere. My goal is to keep it together and stay positive. That's all I need to do is stay positive. Since 2002, every corps member has been found a job. So that's promising. I just wanted to be chosen and not be leftovers, you know? And everyone's coming back with jobs. And I'm used to being hard on myself and it being lies about how I'm not good enough and stuff. But this is kind of tangible proof. So I'm going to a Transitional Team Leader dinner in a little bit. That'll be good. So I guess this is TFA.

I'm being flexible. Or trying to.

-Theresa

Maybe I was meant to teach SpEd.

Here’s the progression of how I’ve ended up where I am right now:

January 2009-- I took a friend to her car and she asked what I was going to do the next year. No idea. She told me her and her husband were moving to Phoenix and were looking for a roommate. I thought about it.

February 2009- I applied for Phoenix Teaching Fellows, a teaching fellowship that requires three years of commitment, while teaching and getting a Master of Education

March 2009—PTF offered me an interview for middle school language arts and told me to start taking tests. Planned a road trip with Nate and Sarah to Phoenix to look at places and take my test.

Mid-March 2009—Got a phone call from PTF saying that all language arts positions had been filled and that I was now being considered for SpEd. I turned the position down but took the certification test anyway. It was too late to get any money back and it was an expensive test.

Next day—Started looking for something new to do. Applied for AmeriCorps.

Two days later—Heard from Sister Carmen who wanted to interview me for AmeriCorps in Phoenix.

One week later (Last week of March)—Drove with Nate and Sarah to Phoenix, took the certification test (passed), met Sister Carmen, found a place to live. I was placed at a school for AmeriCorps.

Fast forward…

July 2009- Move to Phoenix.

July 2009-September 2009-- Sorted things out. (Read: cried a lot.)

September 2009—Start volunteering at school.

September 2009- January 2010—Pull hair out due to frustration with position.

December 2009—Apply to Phoenix Teaching Fellows again.

January 2010—Apply to Teach For America because I want to really make a change and never checked the “interested in teaching special education” box. However, am now considerably less afraid of it.

February 2010—Offered a SpEd position with PTF again. Turn it down because I really wanted TFA.

February 2010- March 2010—Freak out about application and getting accepted and what if I just threw away a job?

March 2010—Got accepted to TFA. For SpEd. Happysad.

At present—I’m finally happy about it. I’m really excited to spend time with kids in SpEd classrooms. One of my friends let me lead a few lessons in her class. A few other teachers let me help them out during the day just to get more exposure. And I’m sure they wanted help. But I’m really excited. SpEd here is a little different than in other places. Given, there are a few self-contained rooms, which is where the students only have classes with each other. But there is a ridiculous amount of funding for SpEd in Phoenix. It comes out of a different fund. So there are at least two resource classes at any given elementary school in the area if they subscribe to that method. Students who are behind grade level are pulled out for four hours a day in order to be taught in a SpEd room. There is a large push toward inclusion, which is where a SpEd teacher and a general education teacher team-teach a class. I have my fingers crossed for one of these but will in no way be disappointed if I’m a resource teacher.

I guess this is what I’m meant to do. I am embracing that notion.

I’m at induction right now, which is the “fun” part of training for TFA. We’ve gone to lots of meetings and I haven’t been barefoot except for sleeping. And that one time I couldn’t handle it anymore. Today, I’m going to a round-up for the Glendale Elementary School District. Supposedly, about 90% of the people going today will get interviews and/or hired. Fingers crossed. I’ve already been chosen by the district. Now, I just need a principal to hire me.

Anyway, I think I’m going to go read that stuff I should’ve been reading since April… Or nap.

-Theresa

04 June 2010

Awkward conversation starters

1. I can't hire you.
2. I've got good news and bad news and it's the same news.
3. Can I live in your house?
4. When is your boyfriend moving in with me?

1. I had an interview yesterday for a school I was getting excited to work at. I was finally excited to teach special ed because I'd be team teaching. The principal is amazing. It's a straight shot from my new apartment and only eight miles away. But another school district hired me about ten minutes before my interview would have started. I don't know what school or what subject but I'll be working at the Glendale Elementary School District. The furthest school from me will be twelve miles away. There's a glimmer of hope that I'll teach general ed instead of special ed. Either way, I'm glad that even though the principal at the school I currently volunteer at doesn't see that I could be an amazing teacher, an entire school district does, without even meeting me.

2. Jon got into med school. He'll be moving to Tucson by the end of July. Knowing that he was moving away, even though it's only two hours away, made me realize how much I actually like him.

3. I moved all my stuff and a bunch of other random stuff from other people into my new apartment. Institute for TFA is at ASU's campus and we have to stay there for about six weeks. I was going to move my stuff to storage but I know my new landlady so she let me move my stuff in, pay a security deposit (which I haven't yet done...) and officially start paying rent when I move in. Which will be the day before I officially start working at a school. So I'm staying with Jon's parents until Tuesday, which is when induction starts and TFA owns my soul, officially.

4. I'll have a new roommate next year. It's a friend's boyfriend. A little awkward. But he's moving here from D.C. and I didn't make enough friends this year. I considered living with another person from TFA since there's going to be a bunch of them moving out this way but decided against it. But I'm the kind of person who brings work home. And it would be bad to live with someone who did the same thing. I don't think I'd ever see the light of day again. Fortunately, my friend's place is much bigger than mine and they're going to have cable. So I'll probably have my own place. He's moving here the last week of August.

Once I start getting paid, I'm going to be taking more trips.

-Theresa